Joke jokes
I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.
I got the joke from my brother.
How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
I told my deaf mom to be nice to the neighbors. She didn't listen...
How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?
Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.
What did momma seal name her twin girls?
Luceal and Sealia.
Someone at my school the other day said that whoever killed Hitler was a hero. Who's going to tell him?
What did the cucumber say to the bell pepper that wasn't wearing enough clothes?
You need more dressing.
Denki: Hey Mineta, I have a joke.
Mineta: ...go on...
Denki: Ochako's booty.
Mineta: I don't get it?
Denki: Exactly.
Mineta: *cries T_T*
This is the true worst joke ever:
What did the person say to the other guy when he met him?
Hi!
What do you call a dumb and mean crocodile?
A crookodile.
I'm not completely useless; I can be used as a bad example.
What did the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
"Beat it. We're closed."
Want to hear a joke about construction? I'm still working on it.
Why did the blonde stare at the Ford?
Because it said, "Focus."
What did the elephant say to the naked man?
"How do you breathe through that tiny thing?"
What do you call a group of emo people?
"The Suicide Squad."
What do you call two lesbians in a closet?
A liquor cabinet.
I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked, "Is this train running on time?" I said, "No, it runs on steam and coal."
Me: *posts random joke about a duck*
That one guy in the comment section for no reason: "Shut the f*uck up you dumb b*tch you are a piece of sh*t you..."
That other guy in the comment section: "That’s actually offensive to ducks."
Bro it’s a joke...
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
9/11.
9/11 who?
[pause] You said you’d never forget.