Joke jokes
What's the difference between a Lamborghini and an erection? I don't have a Lamborghini.
Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.
How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
More than 9 because my basement is still dark.
The more people who like to eat Tide Pods, the less idiots we have in the world. 😁
Yo mama is so poor, I saw her kicking a can and I asked her what she was doing and she said moving.
Pete: Knock, knock...
Paul: Who's there?
Pete: Boo...
Paul: Boo who?
Pete: Don't cry, it was only a joke!
Paul: I'm going to cry! It was such a bad joke!!!
People are making apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow.
Do you need an ark?
Because I Noah guy!
Wanna hear a skeleton joke?
Sorry, I don't have the guts to tell it.
How did a blonde commit suicide?
She jumped from the basement window.
What’s the difference between a tuna and a tube of glue?
You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna.
What happened to the glue?
I knew you would get stuck on that!
Guess what? Chicken butt.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Anal.
Wanna hear a joke?
Feminism.
My dad told me to do what he did best, so I left.
I will always remember my dad's last words...
Oh wait, I never knew them.
I had an animal pun contest today. He started off by saying something. I don’t remember.
Then I replied, “TOUCAN play that game.” He went silent, and my other friend barged in and said, “Don’t you think he’s CHICKENing out?” I said, “Yeah, just stop HORSING around!” He came back with one, and I ended it by saying, “Ok, let’s MOOOOOve on cow.”
Welp, that’s it.
Did you hear about Hellen Keller falling down the well?
She screamed her little fingers off.
What's the first thing that a battered woman does when she gets out of the shelter?
My last if she knows what's good for her.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
What did one piece of toilet paper say to the other? "I feel really wiped."