Joke jokes
I have a bunch of jokes about unemployed people. It's a shame they never work!
I told my friend yesterday he's literally my dad.
He didn't show up for the rest of the year.
Our teacher said for two kids to stare at a wall for no reason, so I said, "Hey wall, that ass flat like a pancake from McDonald's."
What do you call a Native American with a boner?
A redwood.
A woman delivers a baby. The doctor takes the baby and throws it, smashing it around the hospital room, drop-kicking it, etc. The mother starts freaking out, being held back by nurses, begging, “WHYYYY!!??”. The doctor holds the baby upside down by the ankle and says, “I’m just fucking with you, it was born dead”.
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers.”
She replies: “Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?”
To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
Try to make a joke, but not about yourself.
Well, I have nothing.
Say, "Crack my fingers."
Now say that backwards...
How do you scare a bee?
Boo-bee!
What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam.
What did the other fish say to that fish when he hit the wall? Dumb Bass.
"Hi, my name is Robert. I have no life. Even my PS4 username is gay lil_bama."
I tell short people to reach for the stars.
They are always a bit short of reach.
I always loved going to Bill Cosby's house; he always greeted me when I woke up with "Rapey-rapey, eggs and bakey."
Why did the turtle cross the road?
We don't know yet.
OOF dislike plz I have no life XD.
All of these jokes are DED sub to pewdipie.
All of the jokes are just abuse.
Did you hear about the guy who got his entire left side cut off? Well, he's dead.
A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
So I was in the car with my mom one time and we always joke about me being adopted (I am not), and Michael Jackson's song "Billie Jean" sounds like my name, and so my mom says, as the song is playing, "(My name) is not my daughter, she's just a girl who claims that I am her mum." Wow. *applauds for mother* Love you momma =)
What's the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator?
Refrigerators don't queef when you pull your meat out.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you a lot!