Joke jokes
Why did the baseball player go to jail?
Because he stole first base.
Why did I shoot my dog?
Because it pissed me offff! Ahhhhhahahahahahahahahaha! 👌👌😎
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Heehheehehehehehehe
To get to the other side. Ahaahahahahahahahahahahaa!
Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?
Because it got stuck in a crack! 🤣😂🤣
What is the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage!
What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.
I don't think jokes are very funny.
What is this joke?
Why is a deck of cards similar to a miniature pony?
They are both jokers.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a horse?
An animal abuse warrant.
Why did the elephant cross the road? It didn't see the cars.
Why did Helen Keller ride a broken roller coaster?
She didn't see anything wrong with it.
What's the difference between America and a flash drive?
One is USA, the other is USB. 😂😂😂
What's the difference between America and a flash drive?
One is USA and the other is USB! 😂😂😂
My sister said the onion is the only vegetable that can make you cry...
So I threw a carrot at her.
It's so sad that Stephen Hawking can't stand up for himself.
Three guys are stranded with cannibals on an island. The cannibals said, "Each one of you come back with 10 pieces of fruit and shove them up your butt showing no emotion." The first guy came back with 10 apples, and by the second one, he started to grunt, so he was killed and eaten.
The second one came back with cherries, and when he went to put the 10th one in, he started to laugh, so he was killed and eaten. The two guys met in heaven, and the first guy said, "Dude, you were so close. What happened?" The second one said, "I would have made it, but I saw the third guy come back with 10 pineapples!!" 😝😝🤣🤣
What did Homer Simpson say when he ran over a deer? "DOE!"
What do you call a bunch of llamas?
Alpaca llama.
Why was Stephen Hawking always bullied?
Because he couldn’t stand up for himself.