Joke jokes
My future is so bright, I need a flashlight to see where I'm going.
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"
Why was 7 afraid of 6?
Because 6 8 7.
These jokes are all crap.
Q: Knock, knock? Who’s there? A: Boo. A: Boo who? Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.
Why do blondes wear tight skirts?
To keep their legs closed.
My arse hole hurts like no joke, man. I just had to tell that your heads a peanut, you fucking nonce, kid, you fat fuck sack, your mum you dirty cow!
What did Gandalf say to Mario? "You shall not pass!"
Oh Sans, you're such a bonehead! Sorry if that joke was jaw-breaking! LOL.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words? "System failure."
What do you call a cow that has stuff growing on it?
Mosscow
What's the smartest crime?
3rd degree murder.
How many degrees does it take to change ice into boiling water?
199, because the difference between -100 and +100 is 199 (excluding the zero, because it's not real and it doesn't exist because it's not real).
Get?
Why was Boiling Water hired by NASA (The National Aeronautics and Space Administration) to oversee their Space division?
Because it has at least one hundred degrees.
What is an alien's favourite chocolate?
A Mars bar.
Do you want to hear three jokes?
Joke Joke Joke.
A man in conversation with his friend says that his wife is on a 3-week diet. The friend curiously asks, how much has she lost? The man replies, "her life."
The Chinese food owner always brings us free food. I ask my sister why he does that. My sister said, "Love him long time."
I ask my sister why the Chinese owner brings us free food all the time.
My sister said to me "I love him long time."