Joke jokes
How do you drown a Blonde? You put a scratch and sniff sticker in a pool.
There's nothing else that can beat up dog.
What's up, dog?
Just my depression!
I was at my drumming lesson and I accidentally dropped my drum stick when my sister made a terrible joke.
KA-DOOM-CHA!
My future is so bright, I need a flashlight to see where I'm going.
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"
Why was 7 afraid of 6?
Because 6 8 7.
These jokes are all crap.
Q: Knock, knock? Who’s there? A: Boo. A: Boo who? Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.
Why do blondes wear tight skirts?
To keep their legs closed.
My arse hole hurts like no joke, man. I just had to tell that your heads a peanut, you fucking nonce, kid, you fat fuck sack, your mum you dirty cow!
What did Gandalf say to Mario? "You shall not pass!"
Oh Sans, you're such a bonehead! Sorry if that joke was jaw-breaking! LOL.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words? "System failure."
What do you call a cow that has stuff growing on it?
Mosscow
What's the smartest crime?
3rd degree murder.
How many degrees does it take to change ice into boiling water?
199, because the difference between -100 and +100 is 199 (excluding the zero, because it's not real and it doesn't exist because it's not real).
Get?
Why was Boiling Water hired by NASA (The National Aeronautics and Space Administration) to oversee their Space division?
Because it has at least one hundred degrees.
What is an alien's favourite chocolate?
A Mars bar.
Do you want to hear three jokes?
Joke Joke Joke.