Joke

Joke Jokes

Atom

Q. What did one Iron atom say to the other Iron atom?

A. "We're in the Matrix."

Atom

Two atoms were walking on a street. One atom said to the other: "I'm feeling really positive today," and the other replied: "I know. I stole your electron." Then the first atom said "How Ionic."

Computer

One day a computer said to another computer, "Why are you so dumb?"

The other computer replied, "Because I have low memory."

Reason

"Boom, quick; you have five seconds to give me three reasons to live." "1......2......3 .....4....5..." Did you notice you said nothing at all?

Bedtime

How do you know when it’s bedtime at Michael Jackson’s house?

The big hand is on the little hand!

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  • Abortion

    "_____ abortion clinic, you rape it, we scrape it.

    _____ sperm bank, you spank it, we bank it."

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  • Bartender

    A bartender says, “We don’t serve time travelers in here!”

    A time traveler walks into a bar.

    Friend

    Friend, you so faaaat.

    Me: Boy, at least I'm not built like a Nintendo Switch.

    Orphan

    Orphans don't have parents!!1! ahahahaha ahahaha plz like and subscribe and hit that bell icon #logang #imagamerpersonwedontfuckwiththegenderbinary #wedontfuckingeneral #nofilter #rememberifyousubscribethenisubscribeback

    Dog

    What did the officer tell the lioness after she said she was a dog?

    Oooooooooh girl, you lion!

    Monkey

    A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair. So, she told her sister, and her sister said that ain't nothing, mine's already eating bananas.

    Divorce

    Why did Mrs. Henderson get a divorce from her husband, Harry?

    She was tired of everyone calling the family "Hairy" and the Hendersons.

    Poop

    Why did the poop cross the street? Because it was trying to get in the toilet.

    Nun

    What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?

    One's got hope in her soul, the other's got soap in her hole.

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