Joke jokes
What did the cop say to the muslim breaking the law?
"That's against th-Allah (read like da-law)."
What’s a nun's weapon of choice?
Nun-chucks.
What has two legs and bleeds?
Half a cat.
My young son saw Trump on TV. He asked, "Why is the man on TV painted orange?" I replied, "Son, when Russia pays that much for equipment, they don't want it to rust."
What do Monica and Bill Clinton have in common? They both did not inhale. Lol.
Why is there no toilet paper at KFC?
Because it's finger-licking good.
What did the man say to the girl?
You just milked a cow.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalffeinated.
So, there was this cop on the top bunk of a bunk bed.
Another cop walks in and sits on the bottom bunk and the cop on the top bunk bed said, "You're under a-rest."
What’s the difference between morbid humor and dark humor?
Dark humor is 10 babies in one trash can, and morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
If you ever get bored, tell an orphan to take two days off their calendar. If they ask why, say, "Because you're missing Father's Day and Mother's Day."
What's the difference between a nun and a prostitute taking a bath?
The nun has a soul full of hope...
What kind of sex do priests love?.
Nun.
Some people think incest jokes are funny.
I just think it's all relative.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To get to the gay kid's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
Teacher: What month is it?
Quiet kid: AUG-ust.
Classroom: Visible concern.
What's your favorite color of the alphabet? True or false?
Zozo went to the store and walked out with nothing, why?
Zozo the hobo is a hobo, remember? He doesn’t have any money.
Have you ever walked in to Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.