Joke jokes

What goes black, white, black, white, down a hill?

A fat nun.

When it's April Fool's Day, go to an orphan and say, "Their parents should come back!"

Jokes are rather funny.

What do you call an Asian that steals cars? Tommy toke a motor.

People who put jokes on here re: Depression are really not nice people, you yourselves are a fucking joke. 😩👎

I am trying to re-comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here.

Here are some rules to make a good joke:

1: Don't say “my life.”

2: Proofread your joke and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it.

3: And don’t repost things (although this last one is hypocritical because this was me trying to repost something, but it is still a good rule to go by).

Question: What is the difference between a morbid joke and a dark joke?

Answer: One is 10 babies in a trash can; the other is a baby in 10 trash cans.

One day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed, "You're adopted!" He said, "Yeah, I know. My REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."

What’s red and goes 100 miles per hour?

Babies in a blender.

What do you call a baby potato?

Small fry!

What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?

“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”

Why does an orphan not play baseball?

Because they can’t find home.

Why are a gun and a bag of chips alike?

You pull them out at school and everyone wants to be your friend.

I got in touch with my inner self today, it's the last time I use 1-ply toilet roll.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar... Yeah.

(Not Original Joke)

Little Johnny was eating dinner with his family. His mother went around the table and asked, "Mark, what would you like to eat?" Mark said, "I'd like some fucking potatoes." *SMACK*! Mother slapped Mark. She then asked Suzie, "What would you like to eat?" "Well, I'd like some fucking potatoes," said Suzie. *SMAACK*! She slapped Suzie. "Okay, Johnny, what would you like to eat?" "Well.... I sure as hell don't want no fucking potatoes."

Why did the man cross the road?

Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!

I was going to tell a joke about babies, but I decided to abort.

Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!

I'm not completely useless; I can be used as a bad example.