Joke jokes

What do you call a Chinese boy throwing poo?

Yung Flung Dung.

What is the difference between Putin and an onion?

Nobody cries because of a cut Putin.

What’s the difference between an emo kid and a dead pig?

Suicide squad.

Why couldn’t the orphan run away from home?

Because it didn’t have one.

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples get picked.

What did the parents say to the orphan? "Where are your parents?"

Oh... wait.

What’s a pedophile’s favorite band? Kids Bop.

I have a new joke.

My life. Wait... jokes are supposed to have meaning.

I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys.

Did you hear about the cemetery? I heard that people are dying to be there.

What does a foreigner say when he comes to America?

I don't know, I don't speak foreignish...

Why are orphans bad at dad jokes?

Because they don't have a dad to tell them.

Orphan: I dip my Oreos in water.

Me: Why?

Orphan: Because my dad did not come back with the milk.

How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?

You pay the ice cream man to keep driving.

Hey, do you remember that dragon thing?

Draggin' these balls across your face.

The time is 9:11, time to put your phones on airplane mode.

What does 9 and 36 add up to?

A life in prison.

What’s the favorite song of someone with an Oedipus Complex?

“My Mommy Comes Back”

So here's Uranus, where's my anus?

Every 911 joke isn't that good.

Well, at least not until they come crashing down.