What do you call a plane with no wings?
Sally.
Joke Jokes
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she didn't have any arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
What's the difference between a car and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a car in my garage.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What's the difference between broccoli & boogers?
People don't eat their broccoli.
What's a skeleton's favorite plant? A bone-zai tree. But if they don't like that one, how about a s-pine tree?
What's the best part about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
Stephen Hawking couldn't take the stairway to Heaven, he had to take the lift.
A guy walks into the house carrying a sheep and says out loud, "This is the pig I screw when you're on the rag."
His wife replies, "That's not a pig, it's a sheep."
He says, "I was talking to the sheep."
What is the best part of twenty-one year olds?
There's twenty of them.
Why did Stephen Hawking go to hell?
Because he couldn’t go up the stairs to heaven.
Stephen was a great person, and he will be greatly missed, but I enjoy these jokes too much to not stop.
Why did he die?
Because God made a mistake and pressed Ctrl+Z.
Cannibal (n.) Someone who is fed up with people.
What's worse than a baby in a trash can?
A baby in 10 trash cans.
I would tell you a joke about pizza,
but it's too cheesy.
I'm taking a guitar lesson at school. My band instructor told me he was going to hit me with my guitar. I asked him if that was a fret.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Not Stephen Hawking."
Why did Stephen Hawking roll across the road?
Because he had amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.
Well, I don't have a joke but... I have a poem.
My dick is red, your pussy is blue. I... lied to you.