it's jokes
A 90 year old man takes a Viagra.
Strips off naked, lies down in an alley way. Three chicks walk on by: a blond, a brunette, and a red head.
The red head said, "I'm not letting that go to waste," so she strips off and rides him. When she's finished,
The brunette then strips off naked and rides him. The blond's now worried because she just got her period. The red head sez, "He's dead. Don't let it go to waste," so she strips off naked and rides him. Then he wakes up. He then says, "Wow, two jump starts and a blood transfusion. I'm good to go!"
How long does it take a baby to cook in the microwave?
I don't know. I close my eyes when I masturbate.
Went to my local Indian restaurant and asked the waiter for a chicken tarka Masala.
The waiter said, "What's that?"
I said, "It's the same as a tikka, just a little otter."
I’m posting this again cuz I can and cuz it got thumbs downs and cuz I’m bored. Stop being sensitive snowflakes and get a sense of humor. Geez.
What gun isn’t allowed in Africa? A water gun.
Roses are red, you have a nice lip, it would look better if it was on my tit.
Hey, look, it's that "TRAINS gender" guy. He says, "I like trains." Uh oh!
Why do gay men and lesbians believe that bisexual men don't exist because there is no such thing as male bisexuality?
Because it doesn't cycle 🚲.
I lent my calculator to a friend. He is using it to this day.
Where is the pocket?
It is there, the pocket.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
The hooker can wash out her crack and reuse it.
How many tickles does it take for an octopus to laugh?
I hate it when people think I'm a boy because of my short hair. I mean, what did you expect? I'm gay, of course, I have short hair.
How many dead strippers does it take to change a light?
At least 13 because my basement is still dark.
9/11 is like me after I'm finished with my Lego house. I destroy it! 😄🤣
God, I wish my grass was emo, so it would cut itself.
How did Peter Parker get caught as Spider-Man?
Well, he weaved a really tangled web, and Aunt May saw it.
Why could the zombie not clap? Because it was dead, duh!
Why can’t the turd fart? Because it already shitted!
When you're going to Titanic: It's the best ship in the world.
When you know it's sinking: It's the poor ship!
I had to get my dog. Is it a tree? Was your time and I had fun today after dinner. I had...