it's jokes

Your mama is so stupid, her phone died, so she buried it in the backyard!

I'd make a joke about pizza, but it's too cheesy. I know y'all have too thick of a crust to get it!

Why do police never put an orphan in prison? It's too much like a home.

This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"

God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."

Your hairline is like Mount Everest; it points.

When creating the world, Jesus made the water salty. A person comes up to the water, drinks it, and says: "Why are you so salty?"

Yo mama so dumb, when her computer was asking for cookies, she grabbed a cookie, smashed it onto the screen, and broke the computer.

My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic, but I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.

You are playing as Ukraine in Military Tycoon, and then someone kills you. You see who killed you in nuke revenge, and it says "Putinmoserfucer2342."

It's often said that people peaked in high school.

I think Trump peaked in kindergarten.

A vagina is like the weather. Once it’s wet, it’s time to go inside.

If I ever have a YouTube channel, I'm pretty sure it would be called "101 Things NOT To Do With Electrical Sockets."

What did the squirrel say when he chewed some saggy boobs?

Is it just me or do these taste like nuts?

Why did Stephen Hawking go to his fridge but get nothing out?

It was a dummy run.

When does Stephen Hawking cross the road?

When it says "DON'T WALK."

What did Henry VIII say when he was asked to review Six the Musical?

"It was okay, but I really think they could have cut a few parts."

The teacher asks me what my favourite word is.

I said it but got told off and sent to the principal.

What is my favourite word?

I saw a Down syndrome kid waving at me today, but there's no way I'm swimming all the way over there to save him.

"Eugheugh," said the boy.

What shoe size is Stephen Hawking?

It doesn't matter—he can't walk anyway.

It's true, you know. Stephen Hawking has been up more ramps than Evel Knievel.