it's jokes
A blonde crashes an airplane.
Officer: Could you please explain to me what happened?
Woman: It got so cold in the plane, I turned the fan off.
Officer: *face palms self*
Also officer: Here's your sign.
Have you ever felt an earthquake? It’s not nature; it’s Brandan Bressler.
What do you call a cow with stuff growing on it? Moscow.
Why did the scarecrow get an award? He was outstanding in his field. Okay, I'll admit it's corny.
A letter to all Math:
Dear Math,
Grow up and solve your own problems!
2x6= DO IT YOURSELF!!!!
Wy can't a dinosaw ror? Becase it losed it's voucal kord.
There's a girl I like in my school, but she's always on her phone. It seems that I can't get a SIGNAL from her.
I have special needs, and I was born with it.
Why can't you buy an iPhone X?
It's too expensive.
I was at a milk store and ordered some milk.
They brought it over but spilled it on me.
I said that was a udder failure!
I needed to take a phone call, so I went to the nearest exit. I guess you can say it was very exciting! 😂
Ah, what's that on your face? Oh, I forgot, that is your ass. It's so ugly, you stupid-looking bitch!
It's hard to predict the future,
especially before it happens.
When my friend eats a mint, I say, "Hey, is it mint to be sweet?"
Knock knock. Who's there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald my Halloween candy and now it's stuck in my throat!
Let me tell you a joke about pizza!
Never mind...
It's too cheesy.
Why couldn't the boy go see the pirate movie?
Because it was rated ARRRR.
One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.
— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?
— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.
Yo mama so ugly, she looked in the mirror and it broke.