it's jokes
Mom: It's time for sleep.
Baby: Is that what you think, huh?
Mom: *gives baby pacifier*
Baby: Nice try, hobo.
Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.
*few hours later*
Baby: *still awake*
Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!
Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.
Gf: Babe, do you love me?
Bf: Count the stars and that's how much I love you.
Gf: But it's morning, sweetie...
Bf: Exactly.
Gf: :0, I'll take that as a no.
I heard that your forehead is so big that you could build a neighborhood on it.
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid sitting on his lap?
"Just beat it."
DIS IS NUT FOR KIDS
I tried my best using phone sex online, but the thing about it is the holes cannot fit through.
If you think about it, then adoption is the last choice for getting a child, so those who are adopted were the last choice.
Why do they call it abortion? Because they aborted the mission.
I made a website for orphans, unfortunately it doesn’t have a homepage.
What did the pelican say when he finished shopping?
"Put it in my bill."
If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?
Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!
Keep smearing that make-up around your face, maybe you'll get somewhere with it.
Why was the stadium so cold?
Because of all its fans!
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
SEX Some Event Xaern
Xaern - loving something so much you begin to dislike it.
What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?
Dollar a pop!
Get it?
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?
Because it has no home button.
A man went into a library to get a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian said, "No, you won't bring it back."
Why can't your nose be twelve inches?
Because then it would be a foot.
Why is a waiter good at math?
Because he knows his TABLES! 🤣