it's jokes

All rape can be prevented. It's just a matter of semantics.

I don't have a joke, it's just funny reading them.

How do you make a pool table laugh? Tickle its balls.

When you're going to Titanic: It's the best ship in the world.

When you know it's sinking: It's the poor ship!

A man is standing on the side of the road, waiting to cross, when another man stands alongside him. The first man says, "I have been waiting to cross here for ages. It's impossible to cross."

The second man says, "There is a zebra crossing up the road." He said, "I hope he is having better luck than I am!"

What do people have a shot at when it comes to love? Shooting them in the heart.

Do nothing about people falling down the stairs, it will keep happening.

Put razor blades on the stairs, it will be their last time falling down the stairs.

It must be tiring to put makeup on two faces.

I don't know why my blind kid is crying, but I think it could be the tacks I put on the couch.

Yo mama so stupid, she stared at a bottle of orange juice for 12 hours because it said "concentrate."

I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...

My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house.

Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood.

Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job.

My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I'm good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.

A young blonde woman fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a shop and buys a handgun.

The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. The hysterical blonde tells her husband: "Shut up... you're next!"

What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An envelope.

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police... Who? It's the police, let me in so I can get some donuts!

9/11 is like genders.

There used to be two of them, and now it’s a touchy subject.

How do you make it hard for a rapist who is trying to rape you? Rub it.

Why did the sun go to church?

Because it needs Jesus.

My uncle can't walk straight. I think it's because he's gay.

Why are orphans unable to work at S.C. Johnson?

Because it’s a family business.