it's jokes
I don’t believe in reincarnation now, and I didn’t believe in it when I was a hamster.
—Shane Richie, British actor
I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless.
Why is a ball rolling when you put it on a hill?
Because it is circle.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
One time you walked up to a mirror, but it’s shattered because of your reflection.
I'm in a wheelchair, right, so I've tried everything but one stand up.
It didn't work.
So, one day I saw a dog outside, so I played with it. Then I was like, "I’m gonna see its name and where it lives." So I did. Then... its name was Momo. Then I looked to see where it lived. It said "Joe Momma Street."
I just gotta come out and say it: I like miners, and I don’t care what y’all think. I mean the fact that they are risking their lives just to make ours a little easier is amazing. I’ve always wanted to marry one, to be honest. Y’all need to give more respect to the mining ⛏ community.
How long is it?
What's 9 divided by 11?
Well, I know it's less than two alright!
Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it said "Damn!"
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
Why did the flamingo cross the road?
Because it was the chicken's day off.
Q: Knock, knock? Who’s there? A: Boo. A: Boo who? Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
Where did little billy go when he was stuck in a minefield... everywhere.
That joke was pretty dark, but it got pretty light for a second.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
What do you call a dog with no legs?
...You can't call it anything. It won't come to you.
What time is it when you get mad 😡 at school? Time to calm down.
Your mom is so slow it took her 9 months to create a joke.