it's jokes
What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?
“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”
A daughter asked her mother, “Mom, how do you spell ‘scrotum’?”
Her mom replied, “Honey, you should have asked me last night—it was on the tip of my tongue.”
How many dyslexics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Steven.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?
Harry made it out of the chamber.
Why can't an orphan get married? It doesn't have its parents' blessing.
What did the titanic say as it was sinking?
I nominate all the passengers to the ice bucket challenge.
Your hairline is so far away that even the Hubble Telescope can't see it.
It’s ok to yell “Kobe” after missing a shot, he didn’t make it either.
I heard Pixar is releasing a new movie.
It’s called Finding Chemo.
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?
As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
How does a turkey drive a car? He wings it.
The last joke about the dad was a joke. Don't take it seriously. Can't believe that people actually think that was true.
What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?
Others: R.
Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.
A Texan and an Alaskan walk into a room, and the Alaskan says, "My state is bigger." Then the Texan says, "It won't be when it melts."
My sister gives her hamster to my brother since she thinks I'm irresponsible, so I throw it out the window.
"You have to be more patient!" "Will it take a long time?"
I saw an advertisement for colored pens and how they write. They take a blue pen and write "blue," a yellow pen and write "yellow." I was inspired too.
I took a pen, filled it with my blood, and wrote "AIDS."
There is an Afghan Barbie; it’s a blow-up doll.
An ICE agent tells a Mexican that he can get his green card if he can use green, pink, and yellow correctly in a sentence. The Mexican thinks for a minute and says, "My phone goes green, green, and I pink it up and say yellow."
Why do skeletons hate wind? Because it goes right through them!