it's jokes
Read this word:
Heroine.
Did you read it like the drug or like a female superhero?
The average human male walks for five miles, but the gas station is ten miles away. So why does it take fifteen years for my dad to buy cigarettes?
Why do people with Down syndrome always look funny?
It’s their funny face.
I tried making an orphan baseball team. It sucked because they couldn’t find home plate.
Me: It smells like good fam.
Friend: What's good fam?
Me: Nothing much, what about you fam?
So, a guy walks into a bar, and he tells the bartender, "After this last drink, I'm going to the roof to kill myself." A guy sitting next to him says, "I wouldn't do that if I were you." in which the man replies, "Oh yeah?" So, they both take their shots and go up to the roof. The guy says, "You're not gonna die, watch this!" He jumps off the roof and comes back up. The man rubs his eyes and tells him to go it again. He comes down and comes back up. The man says, "Cool, let me try!" and he jumps down only to kill himself. The guy goes back to the bar, and the bartender says, "Superman, you're an asshole."
How did the skeleton know it was about to rain?
"Because he felt it in his bones?"
No,
He read the weather app, you idiot.
I bought a wooden whistle, but it wooden whistle. So I bought a steel whistle, but it steel wooden whistle. So THEN I bought a LED whistle but it steel wooden LED me whistle.
How many Africans does it take to change a light?
A water bottle.
I made a website for orphans.
It has no homepage.
What's the city with the fastest growing population?
Ireland, cuz it's Dublin everyday!
I bought a new shotgun the other day. Want to know what I called it?
Kurt Cobain's microphone.
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? You nail its other hand to the ground.
A pirate walked into a bar with his ship's steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, "Hey! What's with the steering wheel?" The pirate says, "I don't know but it's driving me nuts!"
Why did the orange stop in the middle of the road?
Please take this down, it's not funny at all!
It's a joke, not a dick, so don't take it so hard!
If it is someone's birthday, say this for a joke:
"A long time ago in a far away galaxy...
YOU WERE BORN!"
I know it's cheesy, but I feel grate.
Why did the sea cry?
Because it felt salty and blue.
If Uranus is so gross, why do they take HD photos of it?
A guy goes to the store to buy thyme.
When he got back to put the thyme away he realized he still had thyme left. This was all for nothing, it was just a big waste of your thyme.