it's jokes
Why don't I poop Windex? Because I Pledge to do my doodie!
Put some Windex on it.
A good dog name is Syndrome. That way when it tries attacking, you can yell, "Down, Syndrome!"
Q: What was the orphan's first phone?
A: The iPhone X because it had no home button.
When you’re trying to attract a partner, it’s important to project the qualities you desire. Shit, have I had to suck a lot of cock lately!?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Pizza.
Pizza who?
Never mind, it was so cheesy.
Riddles not jokes.
What has 4 legs but cannot walk?
What has bark but no bite?
There's a one-story house in which everything is orange. Orange walls, orange doors, orange furniture. What color are the stairs?
What has holes but can carry water?
What is in front of you, but cannot be seen?
What is something you have inside you that is pink, but cannot be seen?
What can you catch but not throw?
And last one:
What can rule, but not command?
Tell me the answers in the comments.
Like 90% of this was from this link: https://parade.com/947956/parade/riddles/
One more thing: Don't google it or search it up, use your brain to answer these.
What did the bison say to his son leaving for school?
"Bye son!"
Get it? Bye son, Bison!
What is a type of cancer that:
Affects you. Is caused by a device. Is annoying. People won't stop talking about it?
Easy, the answer is Fortnite.
So a man walks into the bar. The bartender looks to him and says, "You look like you're having a rough day, tell me about it?"
The man then stood up and became Mario!
Never attempt to foreshadow your own death, you may end up regretting it. You can chop me up and throw me in the fridge if I’m wrong.
Listen, my friends say I am gay, but I tell them I am not because I am not happy. In fact, I have no life. You are my friend. I trust you with my life. Now, can you take it?
Teacher: What does the pig's skin do?
Student: It keeps pig skin together! 😂
Life's like a dick. Women make it hard for no reason.
How do you keep a bull from charging?
You take its credit card away.
What did the mommy cow say to the baby cow?
It's pasture your bedtime.
How can you find out how old a cabbage is?
By looking at its cabbAGE.
One day, two friends found a treasure map. So they decided to try to find the treasure.
After several hours they found the treasure. It was a suit that gives the person wearing it super strength. One of the friends wore the suit and hugged the other friend. They were both red.
If there was a quiz on midgets, here’s the Midget quiz and the questions that would be on it:
1. When midgets get high on any drug, do they get high or medium?
2. Do midgets come out the closet or the cabinet?
3. Are Midgets related to Snow White’s 7 Dwarfs?
4. Is a midget just a human without the mushroom in Mario?
5. Was this funny?
I got a great corona virus joke, but you wouldn’t get it.
What's Barack Obama's favorite vegetable? It's Barack-olli.