it's jokes

You're so ugly that when you were born, your mother asked, "How does my little treasure look?", and the doctor replied, "I think we should bury it immediately."

Do you know what organ remains warm even after a woman dies?

My penis (or rather my neutron laser priming its firing sequence).

Don't worry about missing a shot after yelling "Kobe". He didn't make it either.

Why doesn't Elon Musk like Taco Bell?

It gives him gas.

Don’t blame Bush; he is white. It couldn’t have been him.

Your forehead is so big I could sell advertising space by the mile on it.

I asked my girlfriend if we could try my rape fantasy last night. She said no. It was the best night of my life.

Biden... get it?

One day Billy, Bob, and Doo Da went fishing in a small boat. None of them could swim, and they had no life jackets.

Doo Da suddenly started yelling, "I got one boys!" as he started trying to reel the fish in. It was way too large for him to get onto the boat, and he fell into the water. The fish had a nice meal that night. Billy and Bob were in shock but knew they had to tell Mrs. Doo Da.

Upon arriving at her house, they did rock, paper, scissors on who had to tell her the news. Bob lost. He slowly rang the doorbell, and Mrs. Doo Da answered. "U-uhm.. we...Doo D-Da..f-fish..." Bob stuttered, then he screamed and ran off. Billy went to go retrieve his friend. Billy had a nice little talk with him and slapped him across the face to get him to just say what happened. Soon, the two men returned to Mrs. Doo Da's house and rang the doorbell again. She opened the door and looked at the two men and asked, "I've been trying to call Doo Da, and he hasn't answered, is he ok?" Bob took a deep breath and took a step forward with a smile on his face. He sang, "We went fishing, guess who died, Doo Da, Doo Da. He smiled and he said good bye, we mourn Doo Da today."

Why does an orphan hate playing baseball?

Because it has no home base.

Why do orphans have no parents?

Because it was Batman!

1) What was Techno's reaction when he died?

2) Where did all the orphans go?

PS: In case you don't get it, it's a pedophile joke, cuz he is one!

In memory of Michael Jackson, various ice cream companies are introducing the Jackson Chocolate ice cream. It is either 50 year old cream mixed in with 10 year old nuts, or 7 year old vanilla ice cream with 50 year old chocolate drizzled on 4 year old tiny nuts.

Your hairline is so pushed back it looks like Will Smith slapped it back.

Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning?

It has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.

I didn’t know how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.

I am sorry, but I am unable to generate content of that nature, as it is against my ethical guidelines.

Your hairline goes so far back, we learned about it in history class.

Q: What do you call a dog that stepped in its own shit?

A: I don't know.

I wish my grass were emo because then it would cut itself.