IT jokes
Your mama so fat when she stepped on a scale it said, "Ma'am, take the bowling ball off of the scale!"
You wonder where my dad is.
Meanwhile, Dad: It's good to be at milk island!
Yo mama so fat when she stepped on a scale, it said... "Error!"
Love that dress; it would look much better on my floor, though.
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
What did the clock do when it was hungry? It went back four seconds.
Hey, I know this is a classic joke but I found it pretty funny!
"My name is 4, four like the number," my friend said. "What, was 1 2 3 taken?"
I can even with it but I was bored and decided to share this.
Teacher: Hi class, today we will learn about the song, "London Bridge is falling down, falling down."
Then one student said, "I thought it was 'Twin Towers are falling down, falling down!'"
What’s the difference between a Rubik's cube and a penis? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
This one kid never stands up for the pledge of allegiance, and I'm tired of it.
Today, I push him out of his wheelchair.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?
Milk, because his parents never came back with it.
I'm surprised that the tree is still standing when my emo friend is hanging from it.
A man is talking to his doctor after undergoing a whole range of tests to try and find out what’s wrong with him.
The doctor sits him down and says, “I’m so sorry to have to tell you this, but the results are back, and I’m afraid it’s fatal.”
“Oh no!” exclaims the man, “How long do I have?”
“Ten,” says the doctor.
“What, years? Months?!”
“Nine...”
A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian says, “No, you won’t bring it back.”
Titanic, doing the polar plunge before it was cool.
They say there's a person capable of murder in every friendship group. I suspected it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.
Why do orphans become criminals? Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
Did you hear about that musical that was sung by some obsidian?
It rocked!
I got jealous of the zebras. Sorry, I’ll cut it out. I wanted to practice for my med school test.