Insult

Insult jokes

Girl

57 views ·

Girl: You are gay.

Boy: Who says I’m gay?

Girl: You ARE GAY!

Boy: You are lesbian.

Crowd: OhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhbhbhhhbhH

Wife

1 view ·

I said to my wife that she's so ugly that she threw a boomerang and it never came back.

Egg

What is the difference between an egg and you? An egg gets laid, and you don't.

Parrot

52 views ·

One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer...but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out.

"I'm so sorry," he declared! "I don't know what came over me, and realize I shouldn't have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way...what did the chicken do?" 🐔😂

Idiot

12 views ·

I came home from school one day and told my cat a kid at school said I was an idiot and told me to go kick rocks, so I did, except I kicked him, not the rocks, and I called him the idiot for not moving out of the way.

Chip

4 views ·

Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.

Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!

Kid

9 views ·

So, two kids argued and insulted each other.

KID 1: "Your dad left because he didn't want you, so why don't you kill yourself?"

KID 2: "Well, your dad already killed himself because he didn't want you."

Memory

11 views ·

If you tell a girl they're pretty, they won't believe you. If you tell them they're ugly, they'll never forget it.

Elephants never forget.

Dwarf

320 views ·

When is it acceptable to hit a dwarf?

When he dances with your wife and says her hair smells nice...

  • 4
  • Deer

    3 views ·

    Boy: Crap, I hit a deer.

    Girl: Awe... I guess it’s not so much of a dear.

    Boy: ...

    Boy: Get the hell out!