Insult

Insult jokes

Three people having sex is a threesome; two people is a twosome. So next time someone calls you "handsome," don't take it as a compliment.

My friend once said my opinion didn't matter. I said, "Why did you call me a female?"

Me: What’s that girl’s name from Phineas and Ferb, the sister?

Crush: Candice.

Me: Candice dick fit in your mouth?

Crush: *slaps me, walks away*

  • 2
  • A wife asks her husband: Am I pretty or ugly?

    The husband answers her: Pretty.

    The wife responds: Thank yo-

    The husband interrupts her: Pretty ugly!

    Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in the zoo, But don't you worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you!

    Yo mama is so poor, I saw her kicking a can and I asked her what she was doing and she said moving.

    Someone came to me and said, "Your dad is gay." I just said, "Wait. You know where my dad is? Please tell me!"

    Trump says to Obama, "You know it’s the White House, not the black house, right?" And Obama says, "Yeah, but it isn’t the orange house either."

    Your mama so ugly, when Santa Claus came to her house and saw her, he said, "HO HO HOLY SHIT THAT'S ONE UGLY BITCH!"