INS jokes

What word starts with “F” and ends in “uck”?

Firetruck.

What do Americans and stars have in common?

They both love shooting up.

What is a witch's favorite subject in school?

Spelling!

What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?

The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.

Don’t you hate it when you are driving in a school zone and the speed bump starts screaming?

My pp was in the Guinness World Record book.

The librarian then asked me to take it out.

Tell your mom happy last night. 🍆 in my bed.

This black dude goes up to an Indian guy and says, "What up brotha?"

The Indian guy gets offended and says, "We are not the same."

The black guy then pulls out a gun, and the Indian guy says, "Ok brother, ok brother, we are the same, we are the same."

Do the voice in your head.

Why was 10 scared? Because he was in-between 9/11.

I wish the grass in my yard was emo. It could just cut itself.

I dated a girl, and I didn’t know she was previously in an abusive relationship.

I thought she just REALLY hated high-fives.

What’s the first thing you should do if an epileptic is having a seizure in the bathtub?

Throw in your dirty laundry!

Why was the rapper always happy?

Because he lived life in rhyme.

So I walked into my bathroom to clean some stuff, and no one ever told me you can't put phones in the bathtub!

How do rappers stay cool in the summer?

They drop ICE COLD rhymes.

You hear about Rapboats' time in prison? He kept droppin' the soap on purpose.

Why did the Octopus go down the toilet?

Because he had a toilet call in the drain.

Why did the human eat cereal in the bathroom?

So he could querk.

I’ve seen more life in a bowl of WEEK-OLD GUACAMOLE than in BLESSEDBRIAN’S jokes.

Hugging Leo is a great way to commit suicide... you’d just drown in all her fatness.