INS jokes

What has four legs and one arm? A Doderman in a playground.

Bully 1 to Bully 2: You're ugly.

Bully 2: Look in a mirror.

Bully 1: Just because it worked for you doesn't mean it will work for everyone else.

What did one nut say to the other nut? "The guy in the middle's a dick!"

Deku: Hey Todoroki, are you done with your Halloween costume?

Todoroki: Yes. *comes out in a macaroni outfit*

Deku: Wha- I'm todoroni.

Bakugo: OMFG, I'm out! *blows up UA*

A family put their kid and their dog in an orphanage but came back for only the dog.

For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.

Some kid in a wheelchair called me fat.

I told her, "Do a wheelie!"

One time Uma Thurman was Poison Ivy; she was weird in that, except for her punny jokes.

Dad: Boy, come sit in this hole while I brace the ground.

Boy: I don't want to see Grandpa, he scares me!

You learn something new every day.

Like the people in 9/11 are the world's fastest readers; they went through 100s in under a second.

I was in class and we had to choose another term for words we use everyday. For kid, I chose "child"; for dog, I chose "pet"; and for wife, I chose "dishwasher."

Hey, you know what I told the kid in a wheelchair?

I told him to be a stand-up comedian!

I'm dead serious about Kobe: Kobe in heaven...

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

What happens when the Freedom Towers got hit? They step in Ground Zero.

What does a gun and gum have in common?

When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.

Who are the quickest readers in the world? 9/11 victims. They went through 34 stories in 4 seconds.

My grandpa died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.

These jokes have a good build up, but in the end, they all come crashing down.

My girlfriend is growing watermelons, not in the ground though (we had fun that night)!