INS jokes
Why do orphans get in trouble at school?
Because the school doesn't have any parents to report to.
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?
I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!
Why did the cheetah lose in chess? Because he played against cheetahs!
Why don't gay Greek men have anal sex with each other in Greece?
Because anal sex between gay men is against the law in Greece.
What does an emo kid and pizza have in common?...... The pizza doesn’t cut itself.
A guy was annoyed in a store. I walk up to him and said, "What's wrong, buddy? Don't worry, it's not like you're on an abandoned isle!"
What do an orphan's parents and Nemo have in common?
They both can't be found.
What do you call nitrogen in the day? You call it day-trogen!
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
My sister beat me in a race. She gave me a raspberry. I was bitter.
What's the difference between orphans and girlfriends? I don't have 100 girlfriends locked in my basement.
I put a magnet in my butthole and made the teachers smell it.
Why did the baseball player go to jail?
Because he stole first base.
It's the Olympics.
Q) Why did the man decide not to run in his race? A) Because of Olympiad.
Two blondes fell down a hole.
One said, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"
The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."
What do you call a psychic midget in trouble with the law?
A small medium at large.
Why is the queen the most powerful piece in chess?
Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.
I'm pretty sure that 9/11 was the biggest game of Jenga ever recorded in history.
Singing in the shower is fun, until you get soap in your mouth.
Then it's a soap opera.