INS jokes
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with a bull? They both charge.
I have good faith in the glue police. They usually stick to their word.
When I get naked in the bathroom... the shower usually gets turned on!
Last night, I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it was just a Fanta sea!
What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.
Two persons were in a car. The brakes were broken and they were going so fast that they would crash and die.
The driver said: "Oh no! We will die!" but the person sitting next to him replied: "Don't panic, the stop sign at the end of the road will stop us."
Why was Jesus not good at Basketball?
Because he died in the Cross 😈
What do women and peanut butter have in common?
They're both easy to spread.
What do Asians and John Cena have in common? You can't see me!
How do you confuse a blonde? Put it in a circle and tell it to sit in the corner.
Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle?
Because his wife died.
Black holes and horny black women have 1 thing in common, they suck everything in sight.
How long does it take for 5 babies to die in the microwave?
I don't know, I can't count while I masturbate...
Why didn't the toilet paper make it across the road?
It got stuck in a crack.
Three guys are on a plane: one is Asian, one is Mexican, and the other is an American. The pilot says, "There is too much weight on the plane, you all need to throw something off." So the Mexican threw out a burrito and said, "I have plenty of these where I come from." Then the Asian threw out some rice and said, "I have plenty of these in my country." The American threw out a bomb and said, "I have a lot of these in my country."
The plane crashes anyway, and the three men start to walk away from the crash. As they were walking, they found a boy crying. They asked him what was wrong, and he said, "A ton of burritos fell out of the sky and got me all messy." The men started walking away and soon enough they found another boy crying. They asked him what was wrong, and he said, "A ton of rice fell out of the sky and shredded all my clothes." The guys knew who did it but avoided the trouble. They kept on walking and found a kid laughing so hard he was on the ground, and they asked what had been so funny. The boy said, "MY GRANDPA FARTED AND THE HOUSE BLEW UP!!!"
Did you hear about the homosexual letter? It only came in male boxes.
Two guys are on the playground. One guy says to the other, "Did you know that Hellen Keller had a playground in her backyard?" The other guy said, "No." The first guy says, "Neither did she."
What's the only time you can do almost whatever you want?
When you have a gun in your hand.
Mrs. Duncan knows where you live. She lives there too. In your basement... lolololololololololololololololololol
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.