INS jokes

I was excited my teacher asked me for sex in exchange for a good grade, but then I realized I was homeschooled.

Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle?

His wife died.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

In Antarctica, there are ice dicks for ladies to hop onto.

Little do they know I've been waiting for this moment.

Check out my YouTube Channel! (Gamer Zacoo01).

What do you say to Stephen Hawking when he dies?

"Rust in pieces!"

What is the reason for the first time since I've seen a lot to be desired in the morning? To you, eat ass...

What do a convention of nerds and Kurt Cobain's garage have in common?

There's brains all over the place.

A cat gets its tail run over, and its mother assured him it’ll be okay. “You just have to stay PAW-sitive!”

The mother was later killed in her sleep because her son hates puns. At the funeral, one of her daughters said, “You have CAT to be KITTEN me right MEOW!”

Guess who dies next.

What did the diver say when he was trapped in seaweed?

- Kelp!

In Saudi Arabia, our pick up lines are, "Girl, are you a terrorist? Cuz you da bomb."

I don't like it when people make 9/11 jokes. My dad was in it.

He was the best damn pilot in Saudi Arabia.

If a man drove over a woman, whose fault was it?

The man, because he shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.

Did you know the people in the twin towers were great readers?

Yeah, they went through 80 stories in seconds.

Teacher: "People with depression never get anywhere in life."

Student 1: "My mom has depression, but she died."

Student 2: "My sister has depression and she's going to therapy."

Student 3: "My dad has depression, and he's doing REALLY well."

A player in Baldi's Basics says, "Why are you bald?"

Baldi responds, "Well, I have cancer."

The player says, "Oh, good for you!"

So I made a simple cancer joke on Roblox with my friend, and then both her dumb-ass friends were like, "OMG WHY WOULD U SAY DAT? YOUR HORRIBLE!!" That pissed me off. Like damn woman, it's not like I said, "IF PEOPLE IN YOUR FAMILY DIED FROM CANCER THAT MEANS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ARE ALL DUMB-ASSES." If anything they are actually dumb asses but hey. Also they can't talk. They don't know that I'm abused everyday at home and pressured to get good grades or else I'd get my head bashed against a wall till there is blood. So if they are reading this, SUCK MY ASS BITCH.

I like my women how I like my cigars: 7 years old and coming from Cuban in a burlap sack.

Why can’t pedophiles ever win races? Because they are always coming in a little behind.

Which is the worst place to sit at in a wedding?

Between 2 buttcheeks.

I'll never forget my boss's last words: "We shall serve the best meat in our burgers!"