INS jokes
Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?
Yeah, it went on and on.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.
When you play Flappy Bird in 9/11, the bird is a plane and the obstacle courses are towers.
How do you start a rave in Africa? Stick a pizza onto the ceiling.
I saw a girl crying. I asked her where her parents were, and she started to cry even more.
Man, I love working in the orphanage.
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home.
Orphan: Oh, cool, something we have in common.
Mom: That's why your dad left you.
Me: Why?
Mom: I mean look at you, depressed, suicidal, and unhappy, always anxious, and other mental health issues.
Me: How is that my fault? You are a rude mom!
Mom: Your dad had a heart attack two weeks before you were born, because you are ugly!
(This actually did happen in real life.)
My friend and I were joking about a kid in a wheelchair, and another kid came up and said to the wheelchair kid, "You should stand up for yourself."
What do me and an emo kid have in common:
We both like to hang.
Why is America bad at Clash of Clans?
Because they already lost two towers.
A blind man was walking into a fish market. He took a deep breath and said, “Good morning, ladies!”
The only letters in the alphabet that you know are "KFC."
When was the last time you saw yourself in the mirror?
The first time you have to do a full body workout in chess.
Why did the cheetah lose in chess? Because he played against cheetahs!
What do CG artists and porn stars have in common?
They both composite (cum pose it) at the end.
What do the Twin Towers and my Mom have in common? They both went down on my dad.
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
When you're in the World Trade Center and you connect to airplane wifi.
When you're in the World Trade Center and you connect to airplane wifi.