Infant jokes
What's white, red, and screams a lot?
A baby in a blender.
What's hard about walking through a bunch of dead babies?
My dick.
What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.
The secret to dark humor is the delivery... oh wait, the baby was stillborn.
What's the best thing about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
How do you get 50 babies into a car?
You blend them.
Babies can spread a nasty smell,
especially when you haven't fed them for a month.
What's the difference between an onion and a baby?
One makes you cry when you cut it up.
What's the difference between a Lambo and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Lambo in my garage.
What is round and squishy? A dead baby's head.
Why are babies called bundles of joy?
When you break the bundle, it gives you joy.
The good thing about dead baby jokes is that they never get old.
What do you get when you put a baby in a box of razor blades and throw it down the stairs?
An erection!
What's worse than a bag of dead babies? One at the bottom is still wriggling.
How do you fit 1000 babies in a swimming pool?
A blender.
How do you get them out? Slurp them up with a straw.
What's worse than 3 babies in one trashcan?
One baby in three trashcans.
What's worse than a pile of dead babies?
One at the bottom that's still alive.
What's worse than that?
It's forced to eat its way out.
What's even worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
What’s the difference between a baby and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn’t squeal when I put my meat in it.
What's the difference between a sports car and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a sports car in my garage.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.