Infant jokes
What's worse than a bag of dead babies? One at the bottom is still wriggling.
How do you fit 1000 babies in a swimming pool?
A blender.
How do you get them out? Slurp them up with a straw.
What's worse than 3 babies in one trashcan?
One baby in three trashcans.
What's worse than a pile of dead babies?
One at the bottom that's still alive.
What's worse than that?
It's forced to eat its way out.
What's even worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
What’s the difference between a baby and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn’t squeal when I put my meat in it.
What's the difference between a sports car and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a sports car in my garage.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What is 6 inches long and makes women scream? Stillbirth...
What is blue and sits in a corner? A baby in a baggy.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
What’s the difference between a dumpster full of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What's worse than a baby in a trash can?
A trash can in a baby.
What do you do when your baby starts screaming?
Use more lube.
Trying to make a baby talk is like trying to negotiate with North Korea.
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
How do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? A blender.
How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
Depends how hard you can throw them.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them, with fuck.
What's more fun than nailing a baby to the floor?
Ripping it off with a kick!
Wanna hear something bad? A pile of dead babies.
Wanna hear something worse? The one at the bottom is still alive.
Wanna hear something worse than that? He has to eat his way out.
Wanna hear something that's the worst? He comes back for seconds.