Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.
Incident Jokes
Why were the World Trade Center so mad? Because they ordered 3 pizzas, but 2 came in plane and 1 went to the wrong address.
A man walked into a bar. No wait, a horse,
A man walked into a horse.
"Did you hear about the flasher who exposed himself to two elderly ladies in Central Park? One had a stroke. The other couldn’t quite reach."
What happens when you throw an underage boy between two Catholic priests?
They fight and... You know the rest.
What do computer programming and 9/11 have in common?
They're both inside jobs.
What happened when the 400+ women ate a slice of cake?
She died the next weekend.
True Story
A CO was receiving inmates as they're being recalled from their assigned jobs to prepare for count. An inmate that had passed the officer returned bleeding through his trousers from his crotch. The inmate had an argument with his lover who had told him that he wasn't enough woman for him. As the inmate was bleeding he was crying out, "He doesn't love me anymore!"
The officer called for medical assistance and went into the assigned cell. He found the severed penis. He fished it out of the toilet and placed it in a plastic bag with ice. He claimed that the medical staff at the hospital could reattach it. He took a ribbing from his fellow officers, because most would've flushed it. I retired and months later saw a fellow officer at the store. As we caught up, I mentioned that the last incident I responded to was 'the severed penis.' The officer tells me that the inmate severed his penis again after it was reattached and flushed it himself.
My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.
A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"
Two nuns were sitting on a bench. A flasher flashed them, and one of the nuns had a stroke... but the other one was too far away :)
When does a pentagon only have 4 sides?
When a plane hits it.
Why were the Twin Towers scared for dinner? Because their mom said, "Here comes the airplane!"
I was about to tell a 9/11 joke, but it was too plane.
My uncle died in 9/11. He was a pilot.
Who are the fastest readers?
9/11 victims.
I see all these 9/11 jokes, and I’m disgusted. I personally won’t make a 9/11 joke because they have a tendency to crash and burn.
What's the best thing about 9/11 jokes...
They make you collapse with laughter because the Twin Towers collapsed.
Plane crash in China... pilots names released in the incident are as follows:
Sum Ting Wong.
Wei Toh Low.
Ho Lee Fuk.
Ban Din Ouch.
When the school shooter drops his gun, and the autistic kid picks it up thinking it’s his long lost nerf gun.
I told a 9/11 joke to my friends today.
It didn't land well.