Im Jokes

cancer is so easy to beat im already at stage four!

wen im sad i cut myslef..........A PICE OF CAKE!!

[ when a cop meets a pothead on April 20th ]

Officer : Hi, how high are you?

Pothead : No officer, it's how are you

Officer : oh im sorry ive been high since last night

Pothead : cool, i'd like to give you sum weed, happy 420 sir

Officer : omg thx man appreciate that

There was a orphan once and someone knocks on his door and said "hello son come and hug me" but the orphan says "excuse me who are you?" and the guy says "you dont remember me im your dad" and then the orphan says "fine then if your really my dad, come inside and let me asked you some questions" and the man says "ok then but i am really your dad" then the orphan asked some questions to the man and the man gets some of them right so the orphan believes that the man is his dad and then the orphan says "you really are my dad?" and then he shows his dad his house and the orphan has a room mate and the dad and the orpahn finally get to then bedroom and then the dad knocks out the orphan and then the dad starts to have something with the orphan / son and the room mate hears weird noises in the orphans / sons room and he walks in and see them having seggs and the room mate records it but then kicks out the dad out f the house and then the room mate shares the video to the orphans school chat and then the next day the dad gets arrested because he was actually a gay nonce and everybody at the orphans school call him gay but he really isnt but since he was mad and disgusted he pulled a AK47 out of his bag and kills everybody in the school and was never seen again.

Btw this is a joke so dont take it seriously.

like if im fine ish

im ashamed to admit feeling proud of the rape joke i posted and what went on between me and your mum

why do i tell bad jokes im a lesbian

my sister was hitting on my boyfriend im 11 shes 9 she said go f.ck ur self so i said : "ok thanks for the idea"

im going to piss on the floor read if gay aha

aunt: on internet buying weight loss pills for 15 dollars neice: i found that show on Netflix that you wanted to watch its 3 dollars to watch aunt: im not paying for that shit neice: yet u sit there and buy weight loss pills

When im cutting my grass want ti know what it reminds me of . My arms &legs.

IM BATMAN

I had the BEST day EVER. 1:I woke up 2:I met someone im sad of 3:I had fun and got them back again online. But sadly the order was 2nd, 3rd, 1st.. XD

im throwing an orgy for people on antidepressants lemme know if you can't cum

Little jonnie said to his mate i bet i can make you swear, his mate said goodluck, so jonnie told his mate that he slept with his sister, his mate yelled im gonna fucking kill you!

I thank god that im not ugly as you

*fat man coming in the store* waiter oh god not again :| fat man : hi i would like 3 fries and 19 burgers waiter : sorry sir you will get the owners store out of stock on food can i get you a salad instead? fat man : oh sorry but im the owner and i have alot of stocks the for he record you should get yourself a my order your skinny af gurl you trading to be a stick or something?