Hygiene jokes
The companies that made the hand gel sanitizer must be absolutely rubbing their hands together!
Have you ever heard of the Russian politician who was so afraid of the dark that, instead of going to the bathroom at night, he would use a metal tin that he kept underneath his bed?
His name is Vladimir Pootin.
What do cannibals eat to freshen their teeth?
Mentos.
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One’s finger-licking good and the other is just a fast food restaurant.
Enyaw’s fanny smells of dirty, moist, fishy, rotten egg, dead Elizabeth, pig dick, cow cum filth.
Dirty bitch!
I was at school with friends. One of my friends had hair in her armpits. The rest of my friends and I tried not to laugh or say anything, until one of my friends laughed and told her she had hair in her armpits, so she ran to her locker to get hair remover and went to one of the restroom stalls.
I think your hairline might have the hiccups.
Answer to it: You might have to give it a wash in the shower.
Why do Fortnite players have such good teeth?
Because they like to floss.
Your hairline is gone because you never bathed or brushed.
Charlen's hairline is sooooo fat because it was never brushed.
Why did oozy go to the toilet to eat trains?
My anus smells.
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
Sister: Why does shampoo have directions?
Me: 'Cause God made you.
Little Johnny’s father walks into the bathroom and catches him masturbating. He says, “Son, every time you do that, you kill an innocent baby.”
The next day, his father walks into the bathroom and catches him again. Johnny says, “Bow your head, Dad. Can’t you see we’re having a funeral?”
What's white, sticky, and better to spit out then to swallow?
Toothpaste.
What did one toilet say to the other?
You look pretty flushed.
How did Capetian Hook kill himself? He wiped his butt with the wrong hand.
What happened to the cheetah that took too many baths?
The cheetah became spotless!
What comes after 69?
Mouthwash.