Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss your teeth when you’re done eating.
What do your underwear and the Starship Enterprise have in common?
They are both concerned about “Klingons near your anus”.
What do you call James Bond in a bathtub?
Bubble 007.
So uh I did this thing where I put soap on my brother's toothbrush and then I put more on and colored it to make it look like toothpaste and uh, he is constipated now I AM EVIL :3
My friend is gonna release an air strike. There has to be at least 20 confirmed toilet kills.
Why did the robber take a shower before his robbery?
So he could make a clean getaway!
What did the mouse say after its bath?
"I feel squeaky clean!"
Here is a funny little prank I did on my sister. So she was in her room when she reached to get her shampoo, cause you know girls and hair, when she went to squeeze it out, it came out oil, toothpaste, chicken breast, barf, and onions! SHE PUT IT IN HER HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GROSS BUT FUNNY!
When she got to school she heard kids laughing at her cause the prankster did it again!
Later!
What's long, hard, and slimy?
A bar of soap.
61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, mouthwash
My mom wanted me to brush my hair.
And I just told her that even pet animals don't like their hair brushed...
My autistic son hates taking baths or showers.
I don’t blame him, I don’t like soggy vegetables either.
This morning I woke up, then took a bath with some chocolate mud. At first, when I turned the damn flossers on, I noticed it wasn't water. It was all chocolate mud, and now my body is all chocolatey.
Keep the planet clean. It's not Uranus.
I told my therapist you are too fat and ugly to date grown men. Then she asked me, "You wanna give a judgemental reaction about that?" I said, "Okay, you smell rat pee on somebody's cock."
Where do rabbits take baths and wash their asses?
A: What's the difference between a toilet and a washing basin?
B: I don't know.
A: Then I guess your house looks beautiful...
B: ...
"Look, Ma! I peed in the pool!"
So, I took a poop outside. When I was done, I wiped and got it on my finger. After that, I had Nutella, and I thought the poop on my hand was Nutella, and I licked it. I said, "Daddy chill, what in the heck is this crap?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
why do u have to wipe yourself with toilet paper because bugs can crawl eat your poop and drink your pee
