Hygiene jokes
Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.
What is six inches, goes in your mouth, and it's fun when it vibrates? A toothbrush.
What's at least 6 inches long and goes in your mouth, and it's more fun if it vibrates?
A toothbrush.
My ass itches.
Why couldn’t the toilet paper make it across the road?
It got stuck in a crack.
Why are bald people very easily manipulated by a shower?
Because when they take a bath, they get brainwashed!
Yo momma's armpits stink so bad she made Right Guard turn to left.
Your mama is so fat, when she farted, the world had to wear gas masks.
Straight men change their girlfriends like they change their undies. So, about once a month.
Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One is finger-licking good, and the other is just a fast-food restaurant.
How does a hillbilly mother know when her daughter is on her period? Her son’s dick tastes like blood.
Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.
The companies that made the hand gel sanitizer must be absolutely rubbing their hands together!
Have you ever heard of the Russian politician who was so afraid of the dark that, instead of going to the bathroom at night, he would use a metal tin that he kept underneath his bed?
His name is Vladimir Pootin.
What do cannibals eat to freshen their teeth?
Mentos.
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One’s finger-licking good and the other is just a fast food restaurant.
Enyaw’s fanny smells of dirty, moist, fishy, rotten egg, dead Elizabeth, pig dick, cow cum filth.
Dirty bitch!
I was at school with friends. One of my friends had hair in her armpits. The rest of my friends and I tried not to laugh or say anything, until one of my friends laughed and told her she had hair in her armpits, so she ran to her locker to get hair remover and went to one of the restroom stalls.
I think your hairline might have the hiccups.
Answer to it: You might have to give it a wash in the shower.