Hows jokes
Q: How many more chemo treatments did the cancer patient need?
A: Tumor.
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
How do you quiet a baby down?
Make baby back ribs for dinner.
Guess how I got away from my mom saying I can't play Fortnite? I took my stuff and I ran to Iran.
What did one ankle say to the other? Good morning, how are you today?
How did I get to Iraq? I ran.
How do you sex?
With penis!
Jajajajja funny joke epic laugh. I have been detained, please help!
Hi, how are you today?
How long is it?
Do you want to know how to make a Smurf? CHOKE A MIDGET!
What did one bean say to the other bean?
How you bean?
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He didn't have enough room for any more RAM on his motherboard. I feel so bad for saying that!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His core i5 Overheated. XD
Q: How do you make a fire?
A: Oil and dead babies.
What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.
Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...
How many time does it take to cook a baby in a microwave?
I don’t know, I can’t count while masturbating.
I asked my new girlfriend how many men she’d had before me.
She said not to worry, she could count them all on one hand.
Unfortunately, this was when I noticed she’s holding her cell phone with a calculator app open. I took note of her wallet inside a picture of what appeared to be 10 guys. I asked and she said that’s my fam as well. I noticed an Alabama driver's license. I asked which one was her dad. She said that she doesn’t talk to him anymore because he had sex with the boss’s daughter. I casually asked what he did for work. Self-employed? She said that’s the last time I use ancestry.com!
Walk up to an adopted kid and ask this, "How's your biological parents? Are they well?"
How does a skeleton kill a bug?
They SOCKET!
How do you pet a psychopath's cat?
You get it out of the microwave.