Hows jokes
Little Johnny was in class, and his teacher asked, "How many of you guys are Trump fans?" Since the entire class wanted to be liked by the teacher, they all raised their hands, well, except Little Johnny. So the teacher asks, "Why are you being different again, Johnny?" So Little Johnny says, "Well, because I'm a Democrat. My mom is a Democrat, and my dad is a Democrat, so I'm a Democrat!" So then the teacher responds with, "Well, what if your mom was a moron, and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" Well, Little Johnny says, "A Trump fan!"
How do you find out if your kid is gay?
Lock him in a closet and if he comes out, he's gay. If not, he's dead straight.
How did my dad know I was gay?
He stuck his cock in me and I liked it.
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!
How do you fuck a cow?
Find the nearest Karen.
How old are 9/11 victims?
"There, toddlers, here come the airplane!"
How do you f**k a sheep?
Put your d**k in it and face it off the cliff edge. It'll keep going backwards as you push forwards.
How do you make rape funny? Tickle her while you do it.
I am curious how many likes this will get.
LIKE IT!!!!!
Q: How are Clocks like Pedophiles? A: They both stop at 12.
Never let an orphan watch Fast and the Furious.
All they will talk about is how great their family is.
A man got pulled over, and the policeman had stepped out and said, "Do you know how fast you were going?"
The man said, "I was trying to catch up with the traffic."
The officer said, "There is no traffic."
The man said, "Exactly, that’s how far behind I am!"
How are an emo kid and a hanging child the same?
Depends on who's hanging.
How does a train dance?
It bogies!
I wanted to bomb a restaurant, so I went in there with a bomb, but the bomb got diffused and did not work.
I asked a person standing nearby. I said, "Hey, do you know how to fix this bomb so I can blow up this place?"
He gave me a book.
It was the Quran.
I said, "What the hell is that?"
He said, "This is the official manual for bomb making."
How do emos like their meat cooked?
Medium rawr.
Girl: How much do you love me?
Me: Count the stars in the sky.
Girl: Aww, it's infinite!
Me: No, just a waste of time.
A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"
I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."
Bootylicious lol
How are orphans like Spider-Man?
No way home.
A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."