Howe jokes
You know how sometimes you want to listen to music?
But everything you listen to is just supremely unsatisfying, even if it's songs you usually love; they are just so unappealing, and you have no idea what you actually want to listen to.
A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Puerto Rican!"
Then the blonde replies, "OMG, you dirty little slut! How many is a Puerto Rican?"
I rang my boss and said, "I’m really sick. I won’t be coming into work." My boss said, "Davo, you're sick again! Really! Just how sick are you now?" I replied, "Well, I’m in bed with my sister!"
Hey, how ya doin'?
Well I'm doin' just fine, I lied, I'm DEAD inside.
Don't tell me "it's gonna be alright," I've tried, but I can't fight like this.
Hey how ya doin', I'm tired but I'm trying to fight.
How did the orphan go to school?
Not by his parents.
Memes
when ur bored in class so u post this and people start comenting the best shit
You know how all zodiacs have hairstyles... well not Cancers.
How do lesbians have sex? It’s too complicated. I’d have to show you.
Man with cancer: How much time do I have left?
Doctor: Ten.
Man: Weeks? Months? Days?
Doctor: Nine, eight, seven...
How many orphans does it take to repair a house? None, they don't have one.
How do you make an orphan's hand bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come back.
Girl, you must be a Muslim because you are only 5 years old, yet you know how to give great head.
How many people can you fit in a car?
6 - 3 in the back, 2 in the front, and my nan in the ashtray.
Why do pirates say, "Argh my Hardees?"
Because that's how you tell when they have the hards.
How many orphans can you fit in a bag of chips?
One, if the bag is family size.
School Bully: How's your girlfriend? Oh wait, you don't have any!
Me: How's your parents? Oh wait, you don't have any! *Continues to burn down orphanage*
How do adults like their cookies like their orphans?
Homemade.
How do emo bands prepare for their shows?
They self-harmonize.
How do planets have a baby?
They have spasex.
How do you know someone is going to die?
He can't stop coughing. (coffin)
How is an emo kid’s wrist like Pink Floyd?
It’s all shitty until you reach the final cut.