A vampire walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water. The bartender asks, “I thought you guys only drink blood?”

The vampire pulls out a used tampon and says, “I’m making tea.”

I had a glass of Schweppes lemonade in one hand and a glass of R Whites in the other…I got into a hot sweat I think I have Corona Virus

So today is my birthday today am 13 but yesterday am going to turn 10.but am not even go to school to know the number ten becuase one time at 10 pm in the morning it was so cold in in my hot room so I want outside to drive my car to drive my car. But I stopped becuase the light turn green.i was talking a bath in the front of my car out it didn’t have bin so am taking a sh$t

Sans: What is todoroki’s favourite coffee creamer Half n’ Half hehe

Papyrus: Sans! He’s not even part of our fandom!!!

Sans: bro don’t get so HOT headed about it Just CHILL

sorry not sorry -sans

It’s not my fault my cousins hot ;) YEE YEE


Once there were 2 cupcakes in the furnace the one cupcake said its kinda hot in here the other one said hah a talking cupcake

what do you call Stephen hawkings on fire? [answer] hot wheeles

while fucking a hot auntie pressing tightly her boobs and fondling He: What do you feed your babies ? She: Milk and Orange juice He: Wow, which side is orange juice ? 😋

yo mamas so hot when she walked into subway she gave me a foot long

What is your summer name? Hot 🥵

A hot woman called “Jessie” was showering when the phone rang… Jessie was upset because the phone wouldn’t stop ringing, and she goes out naked from the bathroom to answer the phone in the hall… Jessie on the phone: 《Hello? 》 The one on the phone: 《Oh hi i’m Jeff i just wanted to tell you don’t go out from your bathroom naked next time because my brother is behind you right now trying to rape you》 Jessie: 《Stop it my sister! this is the 10th time you do this cringe joke! it gets boring!》

But sadly it wasn’t a joke and she cried alot that night and learned how not to go out naked from the bathroom again.

Have you ever wondered how would your teachers look if they were 20 years younger than they actually are? I bet some of them would be smoking hot. Especially my 25 years old english teacher. Id bang her if she were 20 years younger.

A horse says to they other horse are you hot?

The other horse says ahhhh a house that talks

what do you call stephen hawkling on fire? hot wheels

evan mom hot

One hot day a cow wanted some shade. He found a tree and started resting under it but there was a chicken bothering him. The cow exclaimed “Moooove”, the chicken didn’t move, again “Mooooove”, and still the chicken wouldn’t move. The cow yelled “MOOOOOVE”, the chicken turned around and said “FUCKOFF”.

Q: Why couldn’t the Queer wist eating his hot dog? A: Because it tasted like shit.

The witch doctor came in my mouth last week. First hot meal I’ve had in weeks