Hope Jokes

so this gu named andrew furda was my boy friend for like a half a week so five days then bam i cut my hair he only liked me for my looks and i hoped he regrets it because it is WAR so if u see dis u going down andrew!

Orphan have no home

I hope I die peacefully in my sleep like my mother. Not screaming like her passengers.

if you're pro life I hope you get hit by a bus today :)

Quote Of The Day: Where there is no struggle, there is no strength. Love you guys, and hope today was amazing!!!

Peace out!!!! <3

My hopes and dreams

i hope you SEA me around later cause i SHORE won't stay here for long

Hope the towers in the morning and get back to you!

The department of touch yourself is coming to the UK near you, I hope Scotland gets freedom I can't wait to leave England and live in Scotland.

Hope everyone is having a good day ❤️

Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think "I hope you get laid tonight." By a tweaker with AIDS.

Hey Guys I haven't been on in like freaking forever! Sorry. Anyways I love you emrald :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDD I hope your on!

Love you all. Hope you all have a nice day, Best regards Koko, <3

Police officers hope you’re a criminal. Doctors hope you get sick. Mechanics hope you get car troubles. But only thieves wish you prosperity. Weird?

Being unemployed is like watching our president fall over himself on the stairs

there’s no hope.

I was in a wheelchair for a few weeks last month. I went through a super traumatic experience, and I *wheely* hope I made a good *roll* mod

Why did the telemarketer cross the road?

I don't know.

I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I play saxophone and I like to tell everyone I am a registered s/o (short for saxophone operator) in hopes of one day starting a jazz band, but now everyone looks at me weird, and when I go to house parties to perform, everyone hides their children, but little do they know I LOVE children. For some reason I got multiple restraining orders because I said “I want to touch the kids so they can one day become musicians themselves... like Michael Jackson”, I have then since moved from my hometown to Florida where I can meet up with other s/o’s, and surprisingly they have similar stories to me, but they say they have never even touched a saxophone, but they do like touching kids, which I’m all down for, just me and my buddies showing the new youth their abilities.

Update: i figured out what they meant by s/o is not the same as my s/o :(

One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer...but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out. "I'm so sorry," he declared! "I don't know what came over me, and realize I shouldn't have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way...what did the chicken do?" 🐔😂