Home jokes
Why do orphans want an iPhone S? Because it has a home screen.
Tell your adopted kid you want to take them back home and tell them their original parents want them, and get them all excited, then take them to the orphanage and tell them their parents died.
Why do orphans play baseball?
Because they have to run back to home base.
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Baseball, because that's the only time they can run home.
In Home Alone, if the kid was an orphan, it would just be called "Alone."
Yo mama is so stupid, when she took a trip to Disneyland and a sign on the highway said “Disney left,” she went home.
How many hookers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Must be more than 9 because my basement is still dark.
What did one orphan say to another? Where's your home?
Why can’t an orphan hit a home run? Because he doesn’t have a home.
Why did the person take crayons to the bedroom?
To draw the curtains.
Why do orphans have to be homeschooled?
Because they can't be home schooled.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is!
I love you. You too. I love you. You have a good night. Love. Love. I love you. You and your mom, love. Love. You have the best friends. Love. You have fun. Love. Is it good? You you have to walk home from school and walk walk home from school. I have fun at home.
My cousin really loves baseball.
He always brags about how many home runs he hit in the minors.
Why can't orphans get a home run?
Because they have no home to run to.
Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?
'Cause he made his home run.
Timmy: *grabs box of Trojans*
Daddy:...
Timmy: Well come on diddy!
Daddy: Well shit lets go son!
Both: YEE YEE
SWEET HOME ALABAMA
Little Johnny was told by his friend that if you go to your parents and say: "I know the truth," they give you money.
So Little Johnny says to his mum, "I know the truth," so his mum hands him 20 dollars and tells him not to tell anyone. So when Little Johnny’s dad gets home, Little Johnny says, "I know the truth." His dad hands him $50 and says not to tell anyone. So Little Johnny tries it on the postman and says, "I know the truth," and the postman says, "Come here, son."
Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.
Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______
New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."
Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.
How many dead strippers does it take to change a light?
At least 13 because my basement is still dark.