Hit

Hit jokes

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Door

  • The next time I knock on your door, I'll hit you instead of the door.

    Car Accident

  • *gets hit by a car*

    Passerby: "ARE YOU OKAY?"

    Me: "Please...I need my...phone."

    *opens twitter*

    Me: "LMFAOOOOOOO YALL GUESS WHAT"

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    Bus Driver

  • Man: Aw man, I'm having a bad day.

    Man's friend: Same.

    Man: So why did you have a bad day? My brother got hit by the school bus.

    Man's friend: I got fired as a bus driver.

    Man: Oh great heavens!

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    Nun

  • Man: How tall is a penguin?

    Bartender: About three foot, why?

    Man: Oh shit, the Bible-bashing nuns! I fucking hit one!

    Poor car.

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    Mama

  • Your mama is so fat and stupid. She got hit by a school bus. Her reply was, "Who threw that Twinkie at me?"

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  • Noose

  • An apple and an emo girl fall from the same height in a tree. Which one hits the ground first? The apple, cuz the noose stops her.

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    Jail

  • I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.