Hereness jokes

Blonde

  • There was a car accident, and the cops pull up to the crime scene to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said, "What happened here?" She responded by saying, "A car crash." They then asked, "But how did it happen?" She responded, "The cars crashed into each other." They finally said, "But why did it happen?" The lady said, "Oh, I know where you're going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas pedal, the car goes forward, and they both pushed it, so they both went forward and hit each other." One cop said, "Never mind, ma'am," and they started walking away.

    The blonde lady then said, "Oh, and officers, my computer froze. Do you think I should put it in the microwave or in the oven?"

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    Penis

  • Jack and Jill ran up the hill to pop some pills,

    And Jill said, "Jack can do her without here will," and Jack's penis was still.

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    Plane

  • Have any of you guys heard the classic airplane jokes? Here's a good example...

    A farmer, a doctor, and a terrorist are on a plane. An engine fails, and they are going to crash, so the pilot asks everyone to throw out some items. The farmer threw out his apple harvest, the doctor threw out medical supplies, and the terrorist, (not needing a bomb apparently) threw out his briefcase of bombs. They still crashed, and they started walking to the nearest town. They passed a boy who was running. "Why are you running?"

    "My dad got hit by a shiny red object and now he's bleeding!"

    They three of them decide it's best to keep quiet, and continue. They then passed a crying girl, who said that her brother had been killed by a scalpel from heaven. They said nothing and continued. Finally, they see a boy laughing so much he is in tears. They ask him, "What's so funny?"

    "Grandma farted and the house blew up!"

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    Girlfriend

  • I was in a toxic relationship. After some time, my girlfriend died. Her name was Happy. Still got no clue of her body, and here I am lying on the bed so fucking happy.

    Chat

  • I'm bored and I'm sure someone scrolling through here is too, so wanna chat? Pls.

    Lawyer

  • A Mexican bandit made a specialty of crossing the Rio Grande from time to time and robbing banks in Texas. The banks offered a reward for his capture, dead or alive, but offered a much larger award for the recovery of the stolen funds.

    An enterprising Texas Ranger decided to track him down. After a long and difficult search, he traced the bandit to his home town. On a hunch, he checked the town's cantina, and sure enough, there was the robber. The only other people in the bar were the bartender and a scrawny, older man at a back table. The time was right to make a move. The ranger drew his revolver, charged into the cantina, and announced: "You are under arrest. I get a reward for you, dead or alive. Tell me where the money is, and I'll let you live. If you don't, I'll shoot you right here, and save myself the trouble of having to take you back to Texas alive."

    But the bandit didn't speak English, and the Ranger didn't speak Spanish. As it turned out, the scrawny man at the back of the bar happened to be a lawyer. He knew the robber, and was bilingual, and quickly offered to translate for the two of them. The ranger said: "Tell him that if he doesn't tell me where the loot is, I'll shoot him here and now." Upon hearing what the Ranger had said, and seeing the cold look in his eye, the bandit knew that the Ranger meant it - if he did not give up his loot, he was a dead man. Terrified, the bandit blurted out in Spanish that the loot was buried in an old barn at the outskirts of town. "What did he say?" asked the Ranger. The lawyer answered: "He said, 'You don't have the nerve to shoot me, Yankee swine.'"

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    Evidence

  • So basically Star25/AG3.0 and GG miller are the same person since I found some evidence.

    On one post, AG3.0 asked GG miller what’s his name.

    Post right here: worstjokesever.com/community/p/6509c2cbefa8ad0a8dfd8dc5

    So gg miller replied, “MILLER IS MY REAL LAST NAME, AND GG IS MY REAL MIDDLE NAME”

    So, we already know Star25’s real name is Adrian Gorges because when he had the AG3.0 account, he said that AG stands for Adrian Gorges. And we also can back this up with his tik tok. www.tiktok.com/@adriangorges2010?lang=en

    But, there’s an important factor. Gorges can also be shortened to GG.

    So, we know that GG miller is AG3.0, but let’s back this up even further. If you search up adrianmiller2010, it pops up with AG3.0’s new account’s videos. Since GG Miller’s name says, “Miller” in it, that means that GG Miller IS ag3.0

    So taking all of this evidence, we can conclude that AG3.0’s full name, which is, “Adrian Gorges Miller”.

    Lmk if you have any more things abouts ag3.0 so we can expose him even more.

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    Circus

  • Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?

    Person 2: No.

    Person 1: It was in-tents.

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    Orphan

  • I went up to an orphan bully and I said, "Here, look, I made a website!"

    The orphan likes it, but the kid says, "I forgot one feature, though... the home button."

    Word

  • Obama: It smells like UpNigga in here...

    Trump: What's UpNigga?

    Obama: Omg did you say the n word?? Die!!!

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