Hell jokes

What's the difference between school and Hell?

There is no difference.

This is just a bad emo pickup line, lmao.

Are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in!

I AM FUCKING HAPPY AS HELL.

What did Satin say to God??

"Bitch, what the fuck you looking at?"

Whoever made WorstJokesEver is going to hell.

Your mama so ugly, when the baby came out of her, the baby didn't cry. The baby said, "What the hell is this shit?" and walked out of the hospital.

Suzy: How did Jonah fit in the whale?

Teacher: Whales are very big but have small mouths, so Jonah did not actually fit in the whale.

Suzy: Well, the Bible says he did.

Teacher: He did not.

Suzy: When I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in.

Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven? Maybe he went to hell.

Suzy: Then you can ask him.

This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"

God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."

When Leicester City won the league in 2015/16, do you think there was a little lad in Africa running around with "Drinkwater" on his back, annoying the hell out of the locals?

When a 68 year old teacher says: "I am going to tackle an intruder if I have to!"

Me: "Oh hell nah"

Me: *finds out my dad's an orphan*

No one:

Literally no one:

Me: Time to make his life hell.😈

What do you call a helicopter, elephant, and rhino?

Hellephino (Hell if I know)

I burnt down a whole forest and asked myself, "Is this hell?"

Rot in hell?

More like nasty-ass thot in a well.

You call it Hell. I call it Saunaworld DX.

Friend (Evan): Did you do some dumb shit?

Me: Hell yeah.

Friend (Evan): Did you get us both in trouble?

Me: Hell yeah.

Friend (Evan): Will I still help you because you are my best friend?

Both: FUCK YEAH!

Orphan: I finally have a father!

God: And who is that?

Orphan: You!

God: Who the hell is you? Well, it's not me.

Orphan: :l

Why the "hell" is this here?

I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.

He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"

Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"

My best opinion: when life goes to hell, you just go down with it.