Harris jokes
There was a man in a tower, and the other man thought it was a girl, so he said, "Let down your long hair." He said, "OK, I will let my big, super long, hairy penis down for you to climb and suck." Then the other man said, "If you have such a long dick, suck it yourself. See ya, b*tch."
Why did Mrs. Henderson get a divorce from her husband, Harry?
She was tired of everyone calling the family "Hairy" and the Hendersons.
How does the author of Harry Potter get around?
She walks, JK, Rowling!
Why did Harry fall out of the boat?
Because he's hooked!
"Harry Hicks smells of home. Homo is an infection, and infections are made up of atoms."
What did Harry Houdini say when he did his famous vanishing act at a sushi place?
"Now sashimi, now you don't!"
What's the most unrealistic part of Harry Potter?
A ginger with friends.
"Oh daddy," the kid said. "I love you so much!"
"Hey," the man responded. "Until we get the DNA test results, I'm just Harry to you!"
I LOVE BIG HAIRY DICKS!
A bear is like your best mate, Harry.
If you stab them, they die from a stab wound.
Why couldn’t wheelchair Harry Potter go to Hogwarts?
They had no wheelchair ramps or elevators...
Why didn’t Harry Potter use the chamber to teach Dumbledore’s army?
Because at one point poisonous gases were put in it.
A man and a woman get married. The woman was a retired hooker. The man was a poet.
The man said as they did 69, "You taste better than my most delicious gourmet meal." The woman said, "Well, you aren’t too bad either, but the best 69 I’ve gotten and given was Harry. He did it for 24 hours nonstop." They got divorced that night.
How did Harry Potter get down the hill?
Running, JK rolling!
The Harry Potter fanbase.
What is the Harry Potter spell that aborts babies?
Fetus Deletus!
Voldemort: Knock, knock.
Harry Potter: Who's there?
Voldemort: You know.
Harry Potter: You know who?
Voldemort: Exactly!