Hanging out

Hanging out jokes

Angel

15 views ·

Mary is hanging out, and the angel Gabriel descends behind her. She looks behind her and says, "Jesus Christ!" and the angel Gabriel said, "So you already know."

Adoption papers

1 view ·

So, my friend's birthday is in a couple of days, and I was wondering what to get him.

He hangs out at my house a lot, so I suggested adoption papers.

Cancer

17 views ·

Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.

The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...

Emo

1 view ·

You wanna hear a joke?

Two Emos hanging out under a tree.

How many Emos does it take to commit suicide? Way too fucking many, because they never get it right the first time!

Friend

38 views ·

A friend sits across from me at class so I asked if she wants to hang out sometimes. She said yes, so I called her over to my house, and that's the day I found out she was a guy.

The moral of the story: don't try to fuck your friends.

Priest

5 views ·

A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."

The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"

Dad

1 view ·

So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."

Character

14 views ·

Little Timmy is hanging out with Rapunzel, and he mentions Hugo and a few other characters from Varian And The Seven Kingdoms, and she responds with, “Who the frick are you talking about? Since I don’t know them, I got a surprise for you!” She wraps him up in Christmas wrapping paper labeled "For Eugene."

Ketchup

1 view ·

I was talking to my old friend. They said, "We should hang out more!"

I said, "You mean we should ketchup?"

Man

26 views ·

A bicurious man goes to a gay bar.

A gay man offers him a drink.

The bi man explains he doesn't know if he's gay or not.

"That's fine," he says, "let's just have a drink."

The gay man asks him for a dance, and he explains again he isn't sure if he's gay or not.

Eventually, the gay man invites him to go home with him to hang out as friends.

They get to his house, and the gay man says, "Do you fancy having sex?"

He isn't sure, so the gay man explains, "I'll push in slow, and at any point you want to stop, make animal sounds, and if you like it, start singing."

So they get to it, and the gay man pushes in slowly, the bi man bursts out "MOOOOO MOOOOO MOOOOOOVVVEE CCLOSSEEERRRR"

Rope

6 views ·

Why did the guy bring a rope to the party?

Because he wanted to hang out... permanently. 💀😈

Place

4 views ·

What type of place would Papyrus hang out at?

The SPA-ghetti!

*insert ba dum tss here*