Mia’s mother has 5 kids: Lilly, Abby, Alexa, Mila, and.... Q: Who is last? A: Mia.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady, you don’t need to yodel about it!
HA Jokes
My wife and I were out to dinner and the waitress started flirting with me.
"She obviously has COVID," my wife said.
"Why?" I asked.
My wife replied with a sneer, "Because she has no taste!"
Why does the Tower of Pisa lean?
Because it has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
Papyrus: Sans! I heard that a HUMAN has fallen!
Sans: And you gotta bone to pick with 'em?
A man has the power to grant anyone a wish they want.
A kid comes up and says, "I want to be like Batman!"
The man smiles and grants his wish. The child goes home and finds that he is now an orphan.
Roast
You have such a big forehead it has a 6 pack on it!
What has 4 limbs and can make a sidewalk red? Me falling from a 20 story building.
It looks like Kevin Magnussen finally got pole position.
He has the bragging rights that he took over Russia now.
Stephen Hawking doesn’t have a dick; he has a microchip.
What's long and hard and has c*m in the middle? Cucumber. What were you thinking?
Get a calculator.
Okay, anyways, Sally has 69 bottles of boobs (because she is a cannibal that collects boobs) and her friend said it was 222 many. She got caught by the police and was taken to 51st Street. She got arrested for x8 days, so she was BOOBLESS.
Hii! Oh my gosh. It has been forever! How have you guys been? Comment your favorite movie!!!! <3
Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for his birthday?
Because it has no home button.
My brother apparently has this thing called "asthma". Anyway, I took his vape away today, and he was lying on the floor gasping for air, lol. He must really be addicted to it.
It's sad someone has ligma.
Hello everyone, now a question to make it in there is no right or wrong answer, but who here has watched fireb0rn??
I hate jokes about 9/11... every joke has the tendency to crash and burn.
"I didn't get the joke at first, but then it hit me like a plane," the joke was so dark a cop almost shot it.
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an orphan?
An orphan has all their teeth intact.
What do the Twin Towers and a bad joke have in common? They never land well.
