Guy

Guy jokes

Jesus

98 views ·

Guy: Why can't Jesus have M&M's?

Priest: Why?

Guy: Because they'll fall through the hole in his hands.

  • 1
  • Fight

    12 views ·

    How do you break up blind people in a fight? Scream, "I put my money on the guy with the knife!"

    Language

    12 views ·

    Hey guys! Want to know something cool? Google Jesus' language. It's Aramaic.

    Next, google "God in Aramaic". See the results for yourself. <3

    Time

    30 views ·

    A guy goes ice fishing for the very first time. All of a sudden, he hears a voice. “There are no fish under the ice!”

    He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. Again, he hears the booming voice: “There are no fish under the ice!”

    He nervously looks up and asks, “Lord? Is that you?”

    “No, this is the rink manager!”

    Airplane

    84 views ·

    You think on a airplane when a muslim guy gets on, people look at him and think... "Aw, fuck."

    Technology

    10 views ·

    Grandma: You guy's generation is on too much technology.

    Kid: Well, you're the ones that raised us.

    Other family members: ...

    Donkey

    36 views ·

    A Chinese guy said to his friend: "I saw you fucking your donkey yesterday."

    His friend: "No, that's impossible, it's too hot inside."

    Girl

    3 views ·

    One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.

    "What?" Angelica replied.

    "I'm a guy."

    Woman

    4 views ·

    If I grew a nanometer taller for every 2/10 woman expecting a 6’3”+ guy, I would be considered attractive.💀

    Pilot

    68 views ·

    Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.

    My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.