Gun jokes
What do you call an American house?
A gun safe.
Me and my friend were hunting ducks. He had a 12 gauge shotgun, and he looked over and I had a .50 caliber machine gun. He said, "You're crazy!" I responded, "Quackers."
So there was a school shooting in Florida. Why didn't the shooter just go to Disney?.......sorry, I just work there and I'm trying to get people to come on down.
(Me) Hey bro, tell me a joke!
(My friend) Your mom. *Starts Laughing*
(Me) *Fakes laughs* *then points a gun at him*
At this moment, he knew he fucked up.
I wish I was a policeman, 'cause then I would actually have a gun to shoot myself with.
Memes
The school shooter when the cops show up be like:
"Ain't nothing gonna break my stride, ain't nothing gonna hold me down. Oh oh. I've got to keep on moving."
So, y'all remember Hitler, right?
Ok, so I own a gun with Nazi rounds. I shot a guy who was entering my home who wasn't invited. He said, "Did you shoot me with Nazi rounds?" Then I said, "Do you mean 'nein' millimeter?"
There were three men in a car: the driver, a homeless man, and a rapper. The driver takes them to the woods and says, "I'm not really a cab driver, I'm a wanted killer." The homeless man says, "I'm not really homeless," and pulls out a chain. The rapper says, "If we're gonna be completely honest, I'm not a rapper, I'm a cop!"
If I was in a room with Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, Hitler, and my greatest enemy, I would pour out the bullets and beat my enemy with the gun.
I bought a new shotgun the other day. Want to know what I called it?
Kurt Cobain's microphone.
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!
I'm in school shooting. #USA
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair with a gun? RG-XD
Easy way to get away from rape is to become the rapist. All women need to carry a 12-inch dildo and a gun!
Ok, I found this off of an internet meme, this isn't original:
*grabbing kid* Harambe: Ok kid, I don't have much time, but Obama's last name is- *gunshot*
If Republicans really wanted to enact pro-life legislation, they would ban guns, not abortion.
Little Timmy said, "I had a body, eieio, now you are next!" as he shoots you.
Who is white, hairy, and rusty in the tree?
It's Rambo Rabbit with a big gun that was.
How many guns can an octopus hold?
9
The way to stop school shootings is to give children an RPG.