Growing Jokes

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I hated church growing up as a child, it was always standing, kneeling, sitting, standing, kneeling, sitting. I wish the priest would just pick a position and f*** me!

Mom: you need to grow up. your so immature

Me: *glares* get out of my castle ....

Mom: it's a pillow fort

Me: why cant i have an imagination!?

Mom: your almost 19 years old

Me: not good enough ... OUT!

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Would you watch a tree grow? Or a knee grow?

Michael proveed anything is possible in America. Where else can a poor black bo grow up to be a rich white woman?

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

jamal- dads CAN grow on trees joseph

joseph- no they dont

jamal- yes they do. ive seen it

joseph- ...... thanks not what you thought it was

Why did the boy put a chicken 🐔 in his garden?

He wanted to grow an eggplant. 😂

Why can orphans not grow big and strong because they need a parent to buy them steroids

What kinds of apples grow on trees? -All of them.

your hairline is so far back that your forehead looks like a growing parasite

If you hate pedophiles, grow up.

why do orphans ecaome criminals when they grow up, because they want to be wanted

Mom can I be a fire fighter when i grow up Mom: oh you wont grow up caillou

My mom said she wanted to be a comedian when she grows up. So after she was an adult she had kids. When they were old enough she told them you could be whatever you want...

A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day”. The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie? ” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”